News Release

Freshly gloss coated, in the very best 'Old School' traditinon, Freiherr Wilhelm's Pioneers drill in the town square.

For Immediate Release

Contact: Katrina Bettina von Heffelfinger, Political Editor

Die Krankenstadt Tageblat

73 Flickenhofferske Square, Krankenstadt, Grand Duchy of Stollen

Army of Zichenau on the Move Northward!

Previously Disgraced Stollenian General von Drosselmaier Recalled to Active Service

Zollamtstadt, the Grand Duchy of Stollen – 20 July, 1768-- Recent reports by Stollenian officers along the frontier indicate that the Army of the Electorate of Zichenau, under General de Latté and General von Kallweitschen, is on the move north along the post road from the small town of Zollamtstadt where it defeated a small Stollenian force under General von Drosselmaier in late December last year. Since that time, the army of Zichenau has trained diligently in the country around Zollamtstadt.

Army of Zichenau Augmented by Newly raised Battalion of Pioneers

Most recently, a battalion of pioneers has joined the army, which now consists of three units of infantry, a powerful body of horse grenadiers, and a battery of artillery. Under de Latté and von Kallweitschen, this force has been ordered by Pricess Antonia of Zichenau to penetrate into the Stollenian interior and seize the contested province of Schleiz before pressing on toward the Stollenian capital Krankenstadt.

Stollen’s Grand Duke Reverts to Playing the Fool

So far, there has been little sign of activity from within Stollen itself. The Grand Duke Irwin-Amadeus II was, for a while last winter, very engaged with the training and preparation of his army following its defeat at, and withdrawal from, Zollamtstadt. Since late June, however, he has reverted to the high jinks of last summer. Indeed, an anonymous source in the Stollenian ministry has suggested that it is really the Grand Duke’s English valet “Hives” who has run the affairs of state since the very public incident earlier this month, involving his charge, the top half of the Grand Duke’s lobster costume, three dancing girls from the local theater, 12 loaves of bread, and a pair of old boyscout shoes.

Stollenian Future on Political Stage of Apocryphal 18^th Century Europe Questionable

Meanwhile, the Army of Stollen, under the recalled General von Drosselmaier, has been positioned along the frontier between the Grand Duchy and the southern Province of Schleiz with orders to hold the territory and block the advance of de Latté and von Kallweitschen. How matters will develop over the next few weeks remains to be seen, but the Prussian ambassador to Stollen, Heinz von dem Salat, mentioned, during an interview with Die Krankenstadt Tageblat, that the situation for Stollen looks grave unless the defeat of last winter can be reversed.

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